A Dating Analysis From a Guy's Perspective

So I know your first thought when looking at this picture is "what in the world is going on here?"

Let me explain:

This is a picture of guys and girls on varying levels in life. The levels represent maturity, spirituality, intelligence, chivalry, physical physique, and all other differences in virtues and characteristics. As demonstrated by the drawing, everyone is on a different level in life. Additionally as different aspects or characteristics are considered, this snapshot (ignoring all the arrows) would change and the majority would swap places and move up or down.

            On the rare occasion you could get someone who is the cream-of-the-crop in nearly all aspects and wouldn't move at all. Or on the opposite end you could get someone on the bottom of the totem pole who doesn't have anything going for them in life and doesn't try to improve anything. Although, I don't think either are actually possible, as even the cream-of-the-crop people have things to work on, and the people at the bottom of the totem pole have strengths in some areas even if they don't know it.

Logically thinking, one would look at all the various snapshots of their various potential companions and then choose the person that has the best qualities minus the opportunity cost. (By-the-way, this is a marketing equation. Perceived Value = Benefits - Cost.) So if the qualities that the person views as a higher priority are greater than the sacrifice of the other qualities, they'll take the risk and go for the person on the level they are looking for.

It's important to note here that this diagram and analysis is designed for people looking for a potential spouse or long term relationship and not simply a one-night-stand or a temporal relationship with the intent to use someone for their own personal gratifications. Although the latter reason might explain one possible reason for why the arrows are drawn the way they are.

So now comes the analysis of the arrows, the confusing part. (Note: all of these arrows are drawn representing what we, the guys, see. A girl's perspective on this matter is probably entirely different from a guy's perspective).

Alright we'll start with the "Golden Relationship:" So, in my mind this is the relationship that makes the most sense and what I believe everyone should be striving for. In this relationship the guy and the girl are pretty much on the same level. However if you look at things from the guys perspective he sees the girl on a higher level than himself. The same is true from the girls perspective, the guy is on a higher level. Thus each are equal, yet see each other on a higher plane and capable of lifting each other to a higher plane. I believe such a relationship would help both the guy and the girl achieve their fullest potential.

Next we'll go over to the "Most Common" relationships that I have seen and continue to see. Girls go after guys that don't at all measure up to the girl. It appears that girls lower their standards to attract the guy. Why though? Why sell yourself short? Okay, if the guy who is the cream-of-the crop is a little bit out of your league, why not go for the next best? Why go all the way to the bottom of the ladder? (The red arrow is the shocked viewpoint of the guys when this happens, who all wonder "How did she end up with him?") 3 answers that I can think of are these: 1. The girl doesn't recognize her own potential, and sees the guy at the bottom of the ladder higher up than herself (like the green arrow). 2. She wants a guy who is at a lower level than herself, for her own motives, whatever they may be. (Such as desiring to stay in her comfort zone, and not wanting to rise to a higher level, or live a higher life.) 3. She is going for this guy because she feels there are no better options (because of the lack of "men" in society), and this is the best she can do. Somehow to me all of these options just seem like a red flag, and the beginnings of a relationship that is destined to fail. 

I didn't include a chart with the arrows pointing from the guys, because for the most part any woman we go for is a step above who we are. There are however guys that go for girls on a lower level than themselves, but those who do that are doing it mainly to satisfy natural appetites and personal pleasures. In which case a girl who allowed a guy to treat her like that is probably on the same level as him, at least we'd hope, and isn't a girl who has lowered her standards to indulge also in that temporal pleasure. 

Thus the great question and call to action:

Why do we lower our standards, and our vision on both sides?! 

 If a girl feels that a guy at the bottom of the totem pole is the best they can get, then that is our fault. Too many of us are selling ourselves short of our potential and forcing girls to feel inclined to lower their standards to match ours. This shouldn't ever be the case, but it is. As a society we are all continually lowering our standards and selling ourselves shorter and shorter. The vision of our true potential has almost become lost and not even known to us anymore.

Well, now is the time to change! Now is the time to stand a little taller and be a little better.

Girls, it's time to rise up and be Women!

Guys, it's time to rise up and be Men!

Let us all rise up and be who we are capable of being and becoming!